Hey there, David Isbister here. Every year’s end, I put together a bunch of things that inspired me, repulsed me, caused me to smile, or aggravated me. I call it THE HITS AND SHITS LIST. Hits are good. Shits are bad. Wherever possible, I will include links to further reading and vids so you can check it for yourself. This year’s is lengthy, so I shall present it to you in healthy chunks that are easy to chew. With your mind. MIND CHEW. Once all of the CHUNKS have been MIND CHEWED, I’ll put the entire giant list up, so your MIND can CHEW it in a new context. Now that you are familiar with the premise, here is today’s CHUNK- nice and easy reading to start:
HIT!! HIT!! HIT!!
NHL LOCKOUT. Now before you go lambasting me, read both sides of my feelings on this. This year, since summer, I have been quite productive, putting together music projects and merch stuff for Season To Attack, cooking secret suppers, pickling, canning, preserving foods, making soap, and keeping ahead of my convenience and consumer cravings with good hard work at home. Thanks kindly to the NHL not playing and having no progress in coming to an agreement, I have slowly become less focussed on the soap opera on ice, and replaced the obsession and focus I have had for the Canucks for so many years with other things that actually end up being more rewarding and more productive. It’s too bad, because without this lockout, I would have never even attempted to get even more busy than I was. I would have never even known if these fellas could just find a way to PLAY A GAME FOR A DAMN LIVING.
…shit… shit… shit…
NHL LOCKOUT. Seriously guys. You’re killing me. Bettman is a snivelling, stubborn little troll of a man, Fehr just wants to stick it to them and can’t see past RAGE, and I can’t understand what the point of grinding and grinding over a few percent is. These guys all have been enamoured with the sport somehow (I hope) and that is the awesome thing here- they are all working in sports whether playing or on the business side.
To the players- this is what many of the fans are pleading: I have watched you all my life, living in a land where your sport is an honoured cultural tradition. I have spoke the name of Captain Kirk, Trevor Linden, The Great One, and so many other colorful others at the same time I spoke of heroes. This is bullshit. You are making millions, and I know the natural argument is that you worked all your life to get there, but remember the journey. Gretzky, Lemieux, Yzerman, Linden- they all built great wealth and recieved so many oppurtunities to continue to display their love for winning and hockey after they were done playing. But nothing quite beats their playing days, they seem to say. Not only is there no money to make if you aren’t playing- there are no accomplishments up for grabs to display your love of hockey, your competive nature, and hell- your superiority that you know you want to blow people’s minds with. You need us, we need you, but it seems like both of us can live without each other if we have to. If that becomes a proven habit, it only will hurt you. We’ll find something else. Play for glory, for pride, for passion, for country, for friendship and the team first with a focus on money perhaps as an important penultimate reason. You are wasting a gift, losing your way as passionate athletes, and alienating the very and only people who support your grand aspirations and imbue them with any relevance.
PLAY HOCKEY. I’m up to ears in music, preserved food, soap and rad band merch, and whatever else is going on in my life. I could use a distraction and I have support to give after all this accomplishment I’ve had, in part to forget you. HAHA!
HIT!! HIT!! HIT!!
ANCHORMAN, STAR TREK: I nearly died of pants-shitting when I saw Ron Burgundy himself on Conan announce that the legend would continue. Anchorman’s sequel featuring the entire returning cast is going to be released on December 20th, 2013, and I am pretty sure I am going to sleep overnight at a theatre shouting, “Maybe don’t wear a bra next time..” at anyone I see. And then see the movie. A few times. So yeah. Safe to say I am pretty stoked. Check this for a lark!
In the interest of looking less like a giant, lame nerd, I put Star Trek second. Even as I type this, my fingers tremble as they seek to regain their liberation from this enforced composure I am applying to them- HOLY F*CK I AM SO STOKED TO SEE THE NEW MOVIE HOLLLLY FUUUUUUUUU- sorry, sorry. Lost it there for a second. You’d really think I’d just go back and delete that. So sure- I’d say the new Star Trek looks pretty rad. Click and totally squeal and pee and die inside and thrash all around on the floor with anticipation if you want. Not that I did. I know some of you are like that. Not me though, so…
…shit… shit… shit…
NINJA TURTLES: I heard about the new Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles movie. Then I heard it was going to be changed up- the blessed quatro (or double duo, if in reference to the arcade classic :D) - are now portrayed as SPACE ALIENS. Given that I don’t like things that make NO SENSE AT ALL, I put it on the shit list. No links for you too look at. That’s it. Just…no. Just no. Hashtag eff that. Right kids?
A very sincere HAPPY NEW YEAR to you all from all of us in Season To Attack. Part 2 is coming first thing next year! some of this is going to be more intense than today’s portion, but it’s party time, so go live your life. You can show us How To Burn One Night!